"A Cheerful Heart is Good Medicine" -Proverbs 17:22
“A Cheerful Heart Is Good Medicine” Proverbs 17:22
This month, our Wellness Prescription is about something we do not always talk about in the exam room —> JOY
We talk a lot about blood pressure, cholesterol, blood sugar, nutrition, exercise, sleep, medications, and preventive care. All of these things matter. But wellness is more than preventing disease or improving a number on a laboratory report. It is also about living our lives well.
Scripture puts it beautifully: “A cheerful heart is good medicine.” Proverbs 17:22 and science is beginning to help us understand just how much truth there may be in those words.
Recently, we attended a Sri Lankan wedding. It was a beautiful celebration filled with family, friends, culture, food, music, laughter, and dancing. For the wedding, I decided to wear a sari. I have not worn saris very often. In fact, the last time I wore one was at my brother’s wedding 18 years ago. As I stood there with six yards of beautiful fabric, I suddenly realized something:
I had never put on a sari by myself —> My mom had always helped me.
She knew how to wrap it, make the pleats fall correctly, tuck everything into place, and somehow make six yards of material stay exactly where it was supposed to stay. My mother could wear a sari anywhere. She could even ride a motorcycle wearing one! Just thinking about that makes me smile.
But this time, Mom was not there. It is amazing how an ordinary moment can suddenly bring back someone we love. I was getting ready for a celebration, yet there was sadness in that moment too. Then a friend stepped in. She helped me learn how to wrap, pleat, tuck, and secure all six yards. She did such a good job that the sari survived an entire evening of celebrating, including dancing the night away with my husband of 30 years.
That evening I had so much to be grateful for. I was grateful for the wedding celebration. I was grateful for the friend who helped me. I was grateful to be surrounded by family and friends. I was grateful to experience the traditions of another culture. I was especially grateful to dance with my husband after 30 years of marriage. At the same time, I missed my mom.
That experience reminded me of another verse: “A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance.” Ecclesiastes 3:4
Sometimes those times are not as separate as we imagine.
Sometimes we mourn and we dance.
Sometimes we miss someone deeply and still laugh until our stomach hurts.
Sometimes we remember what we have lost while feeling profoundly grateful for what we still have.
Joy does not require the absence of sadness. Perhaps a joy filled life is one in which we allow ourselves to experience both.
What Does Joy Have to Do With Health? Quite a lot.
We sometimes hear dopamine and serotonin described as our “happy chemicals,” but the science is more complicated than that. Positive emotions involve interconnected systems throughout the brain. Dopamine plays an important role in reward, motivation, and learning. Serotonin is involved in mood and many other functions. Positive experiences also engage areas of the brain involved in emotion, memory, motivation, reward, and social connection.
Joy is not simply one chemical being released in the brain. It is a whole person experience.
There is also growing evidence that positive emotional well being and strong social relationships are associated with physical health, resilience, and longevity. That does not mean that happiness prevents illness. Joy certainly does not replace medication or supplements when needed, exercise, nutritious food, adequate sleep, preventive care, or appropriate medical treatment.
But perhaps we should think of relationships, belonging, gratitude, laughter, and celebration as part of wellness too.
Think about many of the moments in life that bring us joy.
A family dinner.
A wedding.
Holding a grandchild.
Laughing with a friend.
Singing together.
Worshipping together.
Cooking a meal for someone.
Dancing with the person you have loved for 30 years.
These experiences connect us to other people.
And connection matters.
Research has found that people with stronger social relationships tend to have better health outcomes and greater longevity. Our relationships can also provide emotional support and help us navigate stress and difficult seasons of life.
Maybe our ancestors understood this long before we had scientific studies to explain it.
They gathered. They Prayed. They cooked. They celebrated. They mourned. They told stories. They passed traditions from one generation to another. They took care of one another. Perhaps some of the things we consider simply enjoyable are actually an important part of being well.
Finding Joy in Our Differences - Culture
The Sri Lankan wedding also reminded me of something else that has brought joy to our marriage. Greg and I came from very different backgrounds. When we were first together, my mother would make curries for him and adjust them so that he could eat them. Over time, something that was once unfamiliar became something he genuinely loved. Thirty years later, when we go out to eat, curry is often Greg’s first choice. I love that.
Something from the culture I grew up with became part of the life we created together.
And that is one of the wonderful things that can happen when we are curious about people who are different from us. Different foods. Different clothing. Different music. Different customs. Different languages. Different ways of celebrating. We can be afraid of differences, simply tolerate them, or choose to learn from and celebrate them. When we share our traditions with one another, our worlds can become bigger.
Scripture tells us: “Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves. ”Romans 12:10 Only a few verses later: “Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn.” Romans 12:15 There is something powerful about showing up for one another in both.
Joy Connects the Past, Present, and Future
Looking at that photograph, I see much more than a sari. I see my mother. I remember her hands helping me get dressed, her curries, and how she adjusted the spice so the man her daughter loved could enjoy the food she loved. I can even picture my mom riding on a motorcycle in her sari, which still makes me smile.
I see the present too. A friend stepping in to help me when mom could not. Another family welcoming us into their Sri Lankan traditions. My husband beside me, and the gratitude I feel for 30 years of marriage.
I think of my 87 year old father, who loved my mom with all his heart, dancing with me now. I think of my brother, who misses her deeply and lovingly helps care for my dad.
And I think about the future. Perhaps one day I will dance at my sons’ weddings, with tears in my eyes and laughter in my heart. Some of those tears may be for the people I wish were there, and some simply because joy can be that full.
Those six yards of fabric somehow connected my past and my present, my culture and another family’s culture, friendship and marriage, sadness and gratitude. ALL of it became part of joy. Maybe that is what a joy filled life looks like. We remember. We love. We celebrate. And we keep dancing.
We spend a great deal of time thinking about how to add years to our lives. Perhaps we should also think about how we add life to our years. Perhaps Joy Is Something We Practice!
Joy will not always simply find us. Sometimes we have to make room for it. Call the friend.
Accept the invitation. Go to the wedding. Celebrate the birthday. Try the curry. Learn about someone else’s culture. Share something from your own. Cook the recipe your mother taught you. Tell the family story everyone has heard a hundred times. Laugh again.
Remember the people who are no longer here. Be grateful for the people who are. And when you have the opportunity to dance, dance.
Life does not have to be perfect before we celebrate it. Joy does not mean pretending that grief, illness, stress, disappointment, and loss do not exist. Sometimes joy is simply recognizing that even in the midst of all those things, there is still goodness to be found, gratitude to be expressed, people to love, and life to be lived.
The Book of Proverbs has been telling us something important all along: “A cheerful heart is good medicine.” Proverbs 17:22
So make room for joy. Not because life is always easy, but because joy can exist alongside the hard things. Nurture your relationships. Celebrate your traditions and embrace the traditions of others. Share a meal. Laugh often. Remember those you love. Be grateful for those beside you. Show up for one another. And when life gives you something worth celebrating, celebrate it. Even if it takes six yards of fabric to get there.
The Wellness Prescription → Because not all medicine comes in a bottle.
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